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Resolutions; easy to make, easy to break

Toula Foscolos by Toula Foscolos
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Article online since January 9th 2008, 11:10
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Resolutions; easy to make, easy to break
It's that time of year again. The holidays have come and gone and we've been left with a few more precious memories, a few more unwanted pounds and a whole new list of resolutions to do better in the New Year.
Resolutions are always a popular song and dance during this time of year. I suppose that blank slates give people hope. They can say: “This year, things will be different! I’ll lose 10 lbs, I’ll start exercising, I’ll quit smoking, I'll stop over-spending, I’ll be a better parent, spouse, human being, etc”. Resolutions hold the promise of perfection, if only, for a little while. Most of the time, people's "resolve" dissipates just as quickly as it appeared and they end up feeling disappointed in themselves and their lack of willpower.

Disgusted with the excess of the holidays (which usually always includes an exorbitant amount of eating, drinking, spending; all the things we now want to banish), we vow to do better. "Aim higher" as notorious womanizer, Alfie, stated in the 2006 remake of the old British flick. Only, of course, he doesn't, because you have to do more than state something. Most resolutions involve something that's hard to do, something that requires concentrated effort, willpower, resolve, for lack of a better word.

I, on the other hand, resolved not to make any more New Year's resolutions a long time ago. I find it silly that, every year, an arbitrary day is given such significance and we're weighed down with the self-defeating desire to change. If you want to change your ways so badly, then just change! Why do you have to wait until the current calendar becomes obsolete? Why not assess what needs to be reassessed and go for it? Will your willpower be any greater on January 1 than it was on December 4? I don't see how…

Perhaps it's the nature of my job and the fact that I'm always scribbling down notes, but I feel no desire to take stock of my life on New Year's and create a to-do list for myself. As French novelist, Anais Nin, once wrote:"I made no resolutions for the New Year.The habit of making plans, of criticizing, sanctioning and molding my life, is too much of a daily event for me." For me, as well…

If you’re one of those people that finds New Year’s resolutions (and their inflated expectations) unnecessary stressors, you can always take the easy way out and --like stand-up comedian Wanda Sykes-- choose a resolution so easy to keep, it barely enters your realm of thought. She recommends: “I will not stab someone this year” as an easy and attainable resolution for most people. But, all joking aside, I suspect that for most of us it’s not only about keeping a resolution, it’s about finding one that truly resonates with us.

This year, as people rattle off resolution after resolution, I propose that you listen to your inner voice and your true self. To borrow travel writer Ralph Pott’s words, resolve to: “live your life in such a way that it allows your dreams room to breathe.” Now that’s something I can get behind!

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